


Garden of Ruin

by virtuous_contract



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Angst, Collars, Dirty Thoughts, Dom/sub Undertones, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Master/Pet, Masturbation, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pet Play, Puppy Play, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-13 04:00:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29272128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/virtuous_contract/pseuds/virtuous_contract
Summary: Zack has been Angeal's ward in Shinra for just shy of a year, and it's taken this long for him to actually struggle with the SOLDIER programme. Now that he does, he quickly finds himself spiralling. Of course, Angeal is there to catch him, granted, in a somewhat unexpected way.Who am I kidding? It's gonna be petplay and smut mayhem. We all know what Angeal's gonna do to his 'Puppy'. Angeal will break Zack into pieces so gently Zack doesn't even notice it.Prequel to "Speaking is Silver, Silence is Gold".
Relationships: Zack Fair/Angeal Hewley
Comments: 42
Kudos: 50





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this new debauchery. We set off on another smut-filled journey. I invite you all for the ride. 
> 
> Here are some warnings:
> 
> * Zack is underage in Canon. I will refer to him as young, but that may just be because Angeal is older in relation to him, but I'm not especially fetishising the age difference. There will be room to age him up in your head. 
> 
> * It might be considered dubcon bc Angeal has a powerful position both as his commanding officer and his mentor. It might also be considered forbidden and hot. I'll leave it up to you.
> 
> You have been warned.

“Today after training, I sat and watched TV with Angeal for the first time. I ended up hovering in the doorway to the living room and he asked me to join. I thought my heart was going to jump right out of my mouth. I knew we were going to live together, but somehow, I never imagined us doing that kind of ordinary things like that. Angeal is so cool and kind. I really like him.”

“Whenever I have a rough day in training I start thinking about the moment I’ll come home to Angeal’s care. He really looks after me so good. He never refuses me anything. It makes me want to give him my all in training.”

“Today I noticed we don’t sit on opposite ends of the sofa anymore. I accidentally let our thighs touch and he didn’t shy away. He must have heard my pulse racing. I’m not sure he understood why though. He could have thought it was just the movie, I guess. Maybe. Ugh, I don’t know!”

“Today I took a serious hit in the VR-rooms. I would have died it if it hadn’t been a simulation, and it distracted me so much I couldn’t finish my class for the day. I felt like shit coming home, but Angeal pulled me down in the sofa, putting his arm around me. He said it was fine, but I feel like I’ve let him down.”

“We’re taking turns leading groups now, in class. I feel so fucking stupid, I thought I was prepared. I thought it would be easy. I don’t know why I believed that, but I feel like I make mistakes all the time. Angeal says it’s a natural part of learning, but I don’t make mistakes like this! I never once thought of the possibility of losing people under my command. I don’t know if I can take the pressure. I feel like I’m losing my footing.”

“I can tell Angeal notices my distractions. He is constantly asking questions, trying to figure me out. I don’t know how to tell him that I think he made a mistake choosing me. His concern and kindness, it’s suffocating. I don’t deserve it, and he doesn’t deserve to get snapped at. I don’t know what to do!”

“Yesterday we got into a shouting match. Even now when I think about it, I’m shaking. How could I scream like that at Angeal? He is the kindest person I’ve ever met, and he’s been nothing but patient with me. I feel sick thinking about it all getting wasted on me.”

“I’ve given up. I don’t know what to do, so I’m just avoiding him now. I can’t bear to leave him, and I can’t face him either. It’s been like this for two weeks. I feel so incredibly low. Like an insect.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zack's been avoiding Angeal for two weeks. It's time to deal with it. Things go an "unexpected" way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello three people on the internet who are into Zangeal. This is for you (and me, obvs).
> 
> Lemme know if this happens to be your OTP and you feel like moving around some commas and correct my prepositions. Chat me up on discord, twitter or send me an email. Links are on my profile.

He could hear the heaviness of Zack’s movements when his ward entered the apartment. They hadn’t seen each other for two weeks. He’d texted Zack, finally snapping after finding his diary, and told him to come home straight away. This had to end, and he should have ended it sooner, judging from what he’d read.

“Zack? In here please.” He called to Zack, taking care not to sound cross.

He could hear Zack boots being haphazardly dropped on the floor, a moment of quiet, a sigh, and then the sound of them being stacked neatly in the hallway. Dragging feet moved through the small apartment. 

When Zack appeared in the doorway to the living room his eyes were wide and so glistening. It must be bad then. Then Zack spotted the diary and looked like the world was ending.

“Come here,” Angeal said, rising from the sofa where he’d been sitting and gestured to the spot in front of him. He’d never seen Zack look quite so dejected, or terrified for that matter. Zack did as asked, his form shrinking with every step.

“Aren’t we in a mess?” He spoke softly to keep his deep voice from startling Zack.

“Sir… That’s… I…” Zack huffed meekly, his voice unusually thick, and he averted his eyes, looking exposed.

“No, not like that. Here,” Angeal’s voice turned quieter, matching the intimacy to the way he placed his hand under Zack’s chin to lift it. If his Puppy wanted to sulk, so be it. But there was no way he’d let Zack do it alone any longer.

The gentle touch earned him a surprised look. Surprised and undeserving. Zack almost made it look painful, and he didn’t like that at all.

“Did you think you could avoid me forever?” he slid his fingertips up Zack’s jaw and traced Zack’s lovely cheekbone with his thumb. He’d missed his puppy too. How could Zack think it was a one-way thing? He huffed inwards at the silliness of the young.

“No sir,” Zack replied gravely, his voice laden with guilt.

Zack tried to twist out of his grip, but he easily followed the movements. A halfhearted grip came around his arm, trying to pull it off, along with more squirming.

“Zack,” Angeal let his tone turn stricter. “Do you believe I’m someone who readily makes mistakes?”

The question made Zack freeze up. “No!”

“Then why would you believe that I have made one with you?”

“I…” Zack closed his eyes, looking every bit like he was hiding tears of frustration. He looked so young and fragile. Pure, somehow.

He could feel Zack’s guilt fill the air like a foul odour. It made him want to comfort, but he didn’t know how. Perhaps it wasn’t the way. He was supposed to teach Zack, but this was a situation he hadn’t foreseen.

“Use your words. Tell me what’s really bothering you.”

“Haven’t you read about it already, sir?” Zack replied sullenly and scowled up at him.

Oh really? He had to fight a fond smirk. He liked this side of his Puppy too.

“I can see that you’re upset, but is it really necessary for you to speak to me like that? I just want you to talk to me.” He let his hands move to rest on Zack’s shoulders.

“Sorry,” Zack mumbled, and there were the tears welling up and overflowing.

“I’m so sorry. Why are you so patient with me? Why aren’t you angry with me?! Shouldn’t you be shouting?”

Angeal frowned at Zack’s bitter tone. Perhaps the situation was direr than he’d thought. Two weeks was certainly a longer sulk than he’d anticipated.

“Everyone makes mistakes Zack. That’s how we learn, yourself included. I have nothing to be angry about.”

Zack shook his head with clear disbelief, and he could feel tension bleeding into him through his palm. He looked like the kindness was rubbing him the wrong way. Was that a thing?

“Would you like me to be angry with you?” He let his deep voice rumble, and he stepped closer to Zack, invading his personal space, making himself tower over Zack’s shrivelled form. He didn’t mean to lord, only to protect.

Even though Zack cowered under him, hopeful blue eyes flicked to him. So wide and deferent. Upset but entirely trusting.

“Should I make you earn your place here in my home?” As soon as he’d finished the sentence, he regretted it. It'd come out far more suggestive than he’d intended. But Zack stopped squirming almost immediately. 

The air grew thick around them while each of them considered the meaning of Angeal’s question. Zack’s eyes grew brighter, expectant. Almost excited, among the other surging emotions on his pretty face.

“As far as I’m concerned, you’ve already earned it, but this isn’t about me, is it?” Angeal murmured, debating whether he should wipe Zack’s tears away or not. He should, but he found himself revelling in Zack’s vulnerability. It was the first time he’d seen Zack cry, and the tears were precious, like diamonds.

When Zack shook his head, it came across as a carefully weighed gesture, and he could practically see Zack becoming porous at the possible implications. Clearly, he’d struck a somewhat unexpected chord with Zack. With it, he could see a glimmer of that open, receptive attitude in Zack he’d come to expect. The attitude that made him want to  _ give, _ to serve Zack as his mentor.

Yes, Zack had been the top of his class and had made a huge impression on him with his rapid progress in the infantry. But somewhere underneath all that Angeal felt more selfish motivations lurking. With Zack’s gleaming, susceptible eyes on him, he could feel them all rising closer to the surface.

It was hardly the first time he was made aware of Zack’s warm, magnetic pull. He’d seen it work just as clearly on others as it was working on him now.

He hesitated, not usually allowing his countenance slip. Perhaps it was seeing Zack like that, seeing this opportunity to widen that crack of raw vulnerability that tipped the scales.

Without thought, he smoothed Zack’s unruly spikes behind his ears to soften the weight of what slipped out of him next. “Would you like me to discipline you?”

He could see how his proposal rattled Zack, but he wasn't pulling away. Instead, Zack leaned into his palm before he let his head drop in soft capitulation. Perhaps he’d made a mistake choosing Zack after all. How had he ever believed he’d be able to resist Zack’s kind, trusting nature?

To be given this time together, to walk with Zack until he’d become a greater man than himself, had gone to his head from day one. Now, it was making him positively drunk. The idea of Zack putting himself in his hands on  _ all _ counts was intoxicating, to say the least.

“If you ask this of me, I will do my best to give you what you need. You can ask me to stop any time, but if you do, it will be for good. We will go back to how it was before today. You cannot knit pick your discipline. Do you understand?” he felt a stab of guilt at his own words. They were half-truths at best.

The truth was that his Puppy looked so willing to put himself in his hands that he barely knew what to do with himself. Now that he’d seen it, he wanted more of it. He told himself that it wouldn’t change that much between them and that he was giving Zack a fair choice. That it was for Zack’s best.

“Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Zack breathed barely audibly. Angeal could tell Zack’s from the way his long, dark eyelashes fluttered, that his eyes were darting around, looking for something to anchor him.

“Then,” Angeal stroked over Zack’s cheek again, before he let his hand fall on Zack’s shoulder, gently pressing down, “get on your knees.”

“What?” Zack squeaked, his deep blue eyes flashing up with wild alarm. In comparison to his own, there was hardly any mako in them yet.

“Do you trust my judgement?” he murmured and skimmed the back of his thumb against Zack’s covered neck, wishing that the Third Class uniform had a lower collar. The thought made him grin at his stupidity, but he did his best to pass it off as something reassuring.

Zack’s alarm gave way for an uneasy frown. Angeal felt like he was witnessing nothing short of a miracle as Zack sank to the floor under his hand. It was confirmation of their bond, of Zack’s dedication to him. It stirred something deep in him that he didn’t recognise. It felt powerful and dangerous.

“Straighten your back. You are still in my home, still my ward. I will not have you feel shame for following my direction,” he said, wilfully interrupting his own thoughts.

Angeal could read the effort Zack made to sit up straight. It was like watching a bad contortionist at work. Zack’s movements were slow and uneven, making the simple correction look like a harrowing task.

“Good, good. Stay there. Don’t let your posture drop.”

Angeal sat himself down on the sofa and turned on the TV. The placement Zack had ended up in kept him from facing either him or the TV. It provided Angeal free range to watch Zack’s minute fidgeting, though it was more muted than usual. It was surprisingly satisfying to see Zack try so hard to sit still. He wondered how long the youngling would be able to keep it up, the near-stillness.

As time passed, something unexpected happened. Instead of Zack’s fidgeting increasing as Angeal had expected, it quieted down almost to nothing. He’d expected complaints from legs falling asleep, or petitions to join him on the sofa within the hour. Instead, he saw something new in Zack, something that clicked into place. Eventually, his back slumped. He could have let up on Zack then, but he wanted to explore this new dynamic.

“Posture, Puppy,” he reminded softly, accidentally letting the nickname slip. Nudging Zack’s thigh with his foot was very preoccupying.

Zack drew a breath to protest. Angeal's heart skipped a beat, wondering if this was the end of it, and he filled his eyes with a steely warning. It proved to be enough to deter the little rebellion.

This had already gone farther than he’d thought, but it wasn’t bad. It didn’t seem bad for either of them. Especially not for Zack, who turned his face forward and did his best to relax without letting his shoulders slope.

Time dragged on, and he had a chance to nudge Zack him twice more for posture before he turned the TV off.

“Would you like to join me in the kitchen while I make dinner?” he asked softly.

“Okay,” Zack said with clear relief and clumsily started to get up. 

Before Zack had set a foot on the floor, Angeal had his hand pressed to the small of Zack’s back. He hadn’t meant for the punishment to be over, and he wanted to remain in control of when that would be.

“I didn’t say you could get up,” Angeal said, as he experimentally leaned over Zack’s form on the floor. To his absolute thrill, he could feel a shiver move through Zack’s body. He dragged his hand up over Zack’s back, and combed backwards through those black spikes, gripping a strand of hair and tugging at it playfully in the direction of the kitchen before he let the grip slip.

“A Puppy crawls.”

He felt Zack's hesitation. Could almost taste the confusion in the air. But when he took a few steps towards the kitchen and then paused, Zack followed him on the floor.

But gods, what had he gotten himself into?

He noticed Zack was trying to crawl as silently as possible, to make it less obvious perhaps. He managed quite well, considering he’d been kneeling on the floor for a couple of hours. He’d cook Zack’s favourite to make up for it. He’d intended to celebrate the end of Zack’s sulk anyway, so the ingredients were all prepared.

“Good Pup. Stay,” he told Zack, went back into the living room to return with a folded blanket and placed it on the hard kitchen floor. “Sit on this.”

Then he went on to prepare the vegetables for oven baking and covered the meat in fresh herbs. All the time he was considering what he’d do with Zack next. He could ask Zack if he felt thoroughly disciplined, but honestly, he didn’t think that’s what Zack would want.

He considered the trust Zack so readily had placed into his hands, along with the lack of resistance to everything that had passed that evening so far. It all pointed to something that couldn’t be put to rest in one night. He wasn’t sure it was enough for Zack to ‘earn his place’.

He slid the tray of vegetables into the oven and dragged a kitchen chair to sit in front of Zack.

“How do you feel?” he asked with a sigh, gently pushing a few stray strands of hair that had fallen into Zack’s face.

Zack looked up with some hesitance, and then a shadow of a smile flicked on his face as he gave a little shrug.

“You can’t avoid me like that ever again Zack. You have an obligation to talk to me so that I can fulfil my obligation to help you.”

“Yes sir,” Zack replied automatically without thought.

“No, this is not an order. Promise it to  _ me _ , not my title. Don’t you think I’m worth talking to? Isn't our relationship is worth that much?”

Zack’s face twisting softly with regret, and he paused, reflecting before he replied. “I do Angeal. I promise."

“Okay then.” He wanted Zack to stop making that face, so he allowed himself to press more intently into Zack’s scalp, searching for any spots that would melt the tension away.

It had the planned effect, and a most relaxed, content expression came over Zack. He’d never noticed Zack being so eager for confirmation, and it was heart-breaking. For all that Zack gave to others, wasn’t he receiving enough in return? Was that why he was like this now?

He shifted his position so that the outside of his thigh was facing the still softening puppy. He beckoned for Zack to lie his head to rest on his leg. A decidedly shy expression took Zack’s face along with a soft pink blush. But it only took an encouraging smile and an open gesture to put Zack’s back at ease.

The weight of Zack’s head and the small, contented sigh he gave was such a lovely sight. It was ridiculously endearing to see Zack trying to figure out what to do with his hands. They ended up loosely curling around his shins. He could feel the warmth of them through his fatigues. They felt so light.

“Puppy,” Angeal mumbled fondly while heartily massaging Zack’s scalp, neck and shoulders. He didn’t usually let himself touch Zack like this, though he certainly had wanted to. Who wouldn’t want to get close to such a beautiful and delightful being? But it hadn’t seemed proper. Now with Zack on the floor below him, the distance between them seemed to have both increased and lessened.

He’d always known Zack loved to be touched. It was plain for anyone to see when observing Zack in class. A casual pat on the shoulder and strokes on his classmate’s arms, ever encouraging and comforting. On occasion, he’d noticed the little shivers of pure joy that his own reserved contact with Zack caused. He’d assumed Zack was like that with everyone, but what he’d read in the diary indicated something else.

He had no idea what to do with that knowledge. Still, it didn’t change anything between them, did it? He’d never dream of letting it interfere with their professional relationship.

He sighed softly, looking down at the mess of black spikes, Zack growing heavier on his knee by the second. He wondered if he could make Zack relaxed enough to drool. The thought startled him, and he collected himself, gently peeling  _ his protégé _ off, to get on with dinner.

Zack let up a playful grunt of displeasure but sat up with a look of general amenity to the prospect of sitting on the floor, in wait for the meal. Angeal couldn’t stop marvelling at Zack for letting himself get dragged along like this.

He focused on the meat in the frying pan, feeling the need to clear his head. He must have been lost in thoughts because the meal was finished in no time. He put his portion on a plate, fervently thinking about what to do with Zack’s.

It still didn’t seem right to ask Zack to sit at the table, but what alternatives did he have? There was no way he would send Zack to bed without a meal. He couldn’t let Zack eat in his room either, it was not recommended by the working therapists who’d given him guidelines on mentoring.

Fine. If Zack hated it, he’d say so. It was supposed to be demeaning, discipline, wasn’t it? Humbling? If eating on the floor wasn’t that, he didn’t know what was.

Before he had a chance to argue himself out of it, he put Zack’s portion on a plate and cut the food into pieces. He took a deep breath before he turned around from the kitchen counter, put a confident expression on, and placed Zack’s portion on the floor next to his chair at the table.

He could feel Zack’s eyes on him, pricking him, full of doubts and hurt. He took a seat and pulled his chair closer to the table. 

“Get up if you’d like, but there is no committee I can send you to for merely struggling. Everyone struggles,” Angeal said soberly.

A tense moment followed, but when he lowered his hand to the side, palm up, Zack crawled to meet it. He let it rest on the nape of Zack’s neck before he gave a few indulgent, sympathetic scratches to the base of Zack’s skull. Roses were blushing on Zack’s cheeks, and he refused to look up.

“I want you to keep your hands on the floor at all times. We will be here until you finish your plate.”

A part of him wondered if he’d lost his mind. Another part wondered if Zack had lost his, when he bent down to take his first mouthful.

A low, grovelling groan from the floor told him it wasn’t a pleasurable experience for Zack. Again, that was the point, wasn’t it?

“Good boy,” Angeal whispered, almost reverently. His chest swelled with awe that Zack would do this for him. Zack’s hands turned to fists on the floor as he began to chew.

Angeal hoped this wouldn’t ruin Zack’s favourite meal for him. The food tasted like nothing because keeping his eyes on Zack’s form bending down for another mouthful was  _ everything _ .

_ Zack was everything _ .

The thought blindsided him, lighting a fire in his stomach. He tried to put it out by drinking his water, but Zack’s eating made the plate clatter on the floor, and it spread the fire through his veins. His hand drifted to his groin in a reflex to press down what was stirring there, and when he realised, he nearly choked on the food in his mouth.

For the remainder of the meal, he was certain the meal gave him as much trouble as Zack's did to Zack. He was eternally grateful that Zack hadn’t looked up at him once. It allowed for time to get himself under control. It was the strangest meal he’d ever had, and somehow, he had to fight his heart from soaring through it. At least he wouldn’t have to fake any pride he felt for Zack. He had it in abundance.

Eventually, he managed to clear his food, and Zack hadn’t bent forward for some time.

“Done?”

Zack nodded slowly.

He got up with his plate, bent down to pick Zack’s up and assess the mess he’d made. Zack kept his head hanging, and he let him. He took a clean towel from a drawer and wet a corner of it, his heart beating faster as he wondered what look his puppy would give him next.

His heart beat in his throat as he sat down next to Zack and beckoned for his student to turn away from the mess on the floor.

“Hands first,” Angeal requested softly. Zack made no indication of moving, so he gently coaxed one off the floor to tentatively wipe it clean. No doubt, food had spilled over the edge of the plate onto Zack's hands as he'd tried to keep it from sliding around.

“The other,” Angeal whispered and brushed over clean knuckles with his thumb.

This time Zack shyly gave it to him. It was such a stark contrast to the usual, confident, easy Zack. So had the pouting, he thought as he wiped. There was a bigger mess than he’d anticipated, so he got up to change to a fresh towel, giving Zack one last moment to collect himself.

“Lift your face, Puppy,” he murmured.

Zack’s bangs swayed as he shook his head. They weren’t entirely mess-free either.

“You did so well, Zack. You followed my instructions precisely and without complaint. I am immensely proud. Now, please, lift your face.” Angeal said, filling his voice with warmth. It wasn’t a difficult thing to do.

Tears were falling onto Zack’s hands now folded in his lap. With a shivering breath, he did as asked. Perhaps it wasn’t right, but the sight of his messy Puppy moved Angeal beyond comprehension. 

Sauce and traces of starch had drenched the tip of Zack’s nose and chin, there were some on his cheeks, in his hair, even on his forehead. The lips were licked clean but glistened red with the strain and the fat from the meat. Dark lashes fluttered with little drops of gleaming tears hanging off them, and more pouring forth underneath.

“You did so well,” Angeal whispered and put the damp towel to Zack’s temple.

He took to cleaning his Puppy like the task was a holy one, and he performed it with utmost reverence. He could tell Zack noticed, because the tears stopped flowing, and some of the tension bled away, as if that too was wiped off.

Angeal wiped the cheeks and chin next, pulled two sections of hair through the towel, and then moved on to the delicate shape of Zack’s nose. The honey-toned skin was moist and smooth whenever he accidentally brushed against it.

He found himself mesmerized by the softness, and though it wasn’t strictly needed, he draped a fresh section of the towel over his index finger and brushed it lightly over Zack’s lips. It caused delicate surprise, and Zack's lips fell open, giving Angeal a glimpse of tongue, teeth and the warm, wet pink flesh inside.

All movements stilled, and Zack chose that moment to open his eyes, his pupils blown fully wide. Pools of black and blue bore into his with a fierce longing that caused his chest to ache. The intimacy was palpable, and none of them dared to do anything but stare at the other.

Angeal could feel his mouth drying at an alarming rate. His breath stirred in Zack’s hair. He was sure Zack could feel it on his face. Did it feel good? He wished-.

Zack shifted forward, carefully placing his hand on Angeal’s knee. The point of contact sent a wave of warmth through Angeal, and a little faster than he meant, he’d gripped Zack’s wrist and pushed it off.

“Hands on the floor, Puppy,” he said, his voice coming out hoarse and dry.

He could see the rejection manifest first in Zack’s eyes, then his delicate brows and that lovely mouth snapped shut to form a hard, thin line. Unable to say anything, given the potency of Zack’s touch being the problem, he dropped the towel in favour of smoothing the wrinkle between Zack’s brows away with his thumbs.

They sat like that until Zack’s breaths were calm and regular, and his face calm as the Banoran underground lakes. The calmness was infectious. Everything about Zack was. As if he was a benign virus, infecting everyone with good feelings everywhere he went.

“Puppy? I want you to crawl to the bathroom. You may stand there, but you will not close the door. No more hiding from me, understood?” 

Zack looked at him raptly with big puppy eyes, taking in every word.

“Get yourself ready for bed, and then I want you to join me in the living room. Alright?”

Black tresses swayed with a nod. There was a brief moment of contentedness, filled with unsaid things and untraced gestures, but it passed and Zack turned around, leaving Angeal with the kitchen chores.

Angeal felt his body move by its own accord cleaning up. He had no concept of how much or little time had passed when he was done. His feet led him to the small hallway and slowed down as he passed the bathroom. He could see the fuzzy contour of Zack behind the clear plastic shower curtain. So much skin.

Zack accidentally dropped a flask with a clatter, startling Angeal into stepping onwards before he could see Zack bend over. There was only so much he could take, and he’d certainly toed the breaking point today. He didn’t dare to imagine what crossing that line would mean. All he knew was that it’d be dishonourable.

He changed into his worn, blue, flannel pyjamas and draped the green silk velvet robe Genesis had given him for Christmas on top. It was far more luxurious than any he’d choose for himself, but now that he had it, he liked it. It was soft like butter against the touch.

In the living room, he slumped down on the sofa and flicked on the news. He realised he hadn’t been watching when Zack appeared in his pyjamas in the doorway.

“Am I allowed to walk now?” Zack asked with a skewed smile that revealed lingering nerves.

“Yes. Come on.” Angeal patted the seat next to him.

He’d never seen Zack walk so apprehensively in their home before. It made him wonder if he’d taken things too far. Doubts and guilt filled him rapidly, but he kept them at arm’s length, keeping up appearances of being the one who knew what he was doing.

Zack halted in front of him, hesitating to sit down.

“How do you feel?” Angeal asked, making his tone casual.

The question had the disarming effect he’d hoped for, and Zack flopped down in the sofa a little bit further away than usual.

“Uh, I don’t know.” Zack rubbed his hands through the spikes at the back of his head.

It was an effort not to ask leading questions, not to put words in Zack’s mouth. Instead, Angeal just waited, hoping that Zack would elaborate.

“I think I feel lighter somehow. It’s difficult to explain…” Zack said with embarrassed laughter.

“Alright? Would you like to talk about it?” It wasn’t a fun thing to ask, but it was the right thing to do.

“Uhm, Maybe later?”

“Of course, any time.” Angeal let himself relax a little. If he’d done something terribly wrong, surely Zack would have brought it up?

“Uhm, Dinner…” Zack fidgeted, pulling at the cording of the sofa cushions. “It was really nice. I mean, it tasted good. Thanks.” Zack flushed with a deep red.

Angeal chuckled softly, the relief being too great not to. He plucked up the TV-remote and prodded Zack with it.

“Your choice. An hour. Anything you want.”

Zack’s brows rose with surprise. “But it’s the news?”

“I’ll catch up with them later.”

“But I thought you always watch the news?”

“Do you want this or not?” Angeal laughed and poked Zack’s thigh with the remote.

“Gimme!” Zack laughed and tried to snatch the remote, but Angeal pulled it back and held it out of reach.

“One more thing,” Angeal said, his voice turning serious again.

Zack straightened up right away, immediately responsive to the subtly commanding tone.

“You did well today, so you may ask me for something. If it’s within my reach, I’ll do my best to give it to you.”

Zack’s eyes were widening as he spoke, and he shifted closer as if to hear better.

“What kind of thing?” Zack asked. Angeal could practically see the wheels turning in Zack’s brain. It was delightful.

He shrugged. “Anything you want. I ask you for things, and if you do them right, you get to ask me for things too. It’s only fair, isn’t it?”

“You’re not joking?” Zack scooted even closer.

“No?” Angeal smiled broadly.

“So if I wanted like a golden watch, you’d just get one for me?”

“Do you want a golden watch, Zack?”

“No!” Zack reached for the remote again, and this time he got it without a fight. He flicked through the menu in silence before he settled on a cop-show with hour-long episodes.

Before he put it on, he got that uncharacteristic shy look about him again.

“Can I sit there?” He pointed next to Angeal.

“Of course.” Angeal draped his arm over the backrest to make room.

Zack crawled over and carefully took a seat, slowly curling up against Angeal’s side. They may have ended up sitting like that before, but they’d never started one that way. It felt oddly new.

“Blanket?” Zack mumbled, clicking the show on.

Angeal pulled a plush wool blanket from the armrest and draped it over both of them, tucking it securely around Zack. None of them felt cold, Mako helped with that. It was purely there for comfort. And it was truly comfortable to have his little ward safely nestled against his side again.

The show took off, but Angeal couldn’t pay much attention to it. He assumed it was something Zack had seen before because he’d chosen an episode somewhere in the middle of it. In his mind, the evening kept replaying as clearly as it had been the ting on the TV. The young, aspiring hero on the floor-

“I can’t believe you read my diary,” Zack said, sounding more surprised than sour about it.

“I’m sorry, I was at a loss-”

“It’s fine. Really,” Zack interrupted dismissively, and then he fell into pensive silence again.

Sirens from a car chase filled the room, along with red and blue flickering lights. It didn’t do anything to the little warm, blanket-wrapped bubble the two of them were sharing.

“Are you going to read it again?” Zack asked a little while later.

“Not unless you disappear, sulking for weeks on end again.”

“I won’t.” Zack paused the show and put enough distance between them to be able to turn towards Angeal fully.

“I have an ask,” he said, sounding very much someone who was trying to keep his voice steady.

Angeal hummed patiently, eyeing his pupil, with curiosity peaked.

“If I’m your puppy,” Zack began, his eyes flicking to his lap before he managed to return them to Angeal, “I think you should pet me like a puppy.”

Zack looked so meek and soft, but his eyes were back to their usual brightness. Angeal cleared his throat and swallowed. The invasive images that flooded Angeal were decidedly  _ not _ how one would pet a puppy. He quickly made an effort to push the thoughts aside, not wanting to leave Zack hanging.

“Alright, today only then.” It wasn’t what he’d expected, but now it seemed obvious. Like Zack had pointed out, he had read the diary. Zack's overwhelming response to the ‘discipline’ was another clear indicator for his needs.

Zack nodded and then carefully moved back to his place at Angeal’s side. This time Angeal wrapped his arms around him, encouraging him to lean into him. He started running his fingers through Zack’s hair, deeming it the safest place. It only took seconds for Zack to breathe out a relieved sigh.

“Aren’t you close to anyone in your class?” he mumbled, uncertain if it was proper of him to ask or not.

“Not like this,” Zack mumbled a non-committal reply.

“What about the weekends? You’re always meeting up with someone. I thought-”

“Stop asking me stuff and just pet me.” Zack put the show back on and lay his head on Angeal’s chest.

“Alright.”

He continued to push his fingers into Zack’s head, looking for any place that would give reaction, all while contemplating those of Zack’s friendships he was aware of. He concluded that he knew less than he'd thought, and perhaps that wasn’t only true about Zack’s friends. Perhaps it was true about Zack too. They’d only known each other shy of a year.

It made him feel guilty as if he’d somehow let Zack down. Perhaps he could have helped Zack build his relationships better. He vowed to himself that he would. Because Zack deserved anything.

Right then a muted groan spilled into his robe, and he couldn’t stop his own soft chuckle. He could see Zack returning it with a content smile of his own.

He let his hand slide down to Zack’s back where he first gave broad strokes, then he scratched over it with his trimmed fingernails through Zack’s pyjama. It earned him another low sound of pleasure.

Looking down, he was met by the most unguarded version of Zack that he’d seen so far. His face was squished, his mouth carelessly open, and his frame rising and falling softly with regular breaths.

Zack wasn’t even pretending to watch the TV anymore, though it wasn’t until the episode ended and the TV fell quiet that it was clear exactly how many little groans, moans and sighs tripped over Zack's lips. They were lovely, mesmerising and incredibly addictive.

He felt like a child, telling himself ‘just a little longer’ as he brushed his fingertips along the delicate skin of Zack’s neck. The shivers it sent down Zack’s spine were noticeable. He had to fight himself not to slide his hand inside the collar of Zack's pyjama to rake over the tempting expanse of warm skin he knew was there.

But to satisfy Zack's cravings to be touched shouldn’t be his job. And the little time he’d allowed for it to be had already been overshot.

“Zack?”

“No,” Zack groaned.

“Come on.” He gave Zack a little nudge to get up.

“Zack’s not available. Would you like to leave a message?” Zack slurred and finished with a sigh.

“I’ll carry you,” Angeal said, humour lacing his little ‘threat’.

“Fine, fine,” Zack lamented and pushed the blanket off himself.

Angeal kept it in his lap, not quite trusting that he’d stayed as serene as he hoped through Zack’s little reward. But it was a one-off thing. They had shared this one special day, and he would treasure the memory, for all its ups and downs.

His thoughts were occupied, so he didn’t anticipate Zack leaning in to wrap his arms around his neck. When Zack whispered a wonderfully sleepy ‘thank you’ in his ear he couldn’t help to pull Zack closer to him. Zack’s lovely body that he’d helped build. It was a rare treat to feel his student pressed up against him so closely.

It was almost sly, the way Zack withdrew, but keeping himself close enough to sneak a peck onto his cheek. Then his Puppy jumped off the sofa as if was nothing, leaving Angeal speechless behind.

“Night!” Zack said without turning around, walking towards his room with a spring in his gait. The difference to earlier this evening was stunning.

The spot where Zack had kissed him tingled pleasantly, and he  _ almost _ allowed himself to wish that it would happen again.

He ended up sitting there long after Zack went to sleep, and truth be told, it wasn’t easy to stop his blood from humming when he finally lay in bed. He put a part of it down to the immense pleasantness of that hum.

Every time he thought it faded, the memory of the countless shivers he'd felt under his hands that day started it right up again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are always appreciated! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zack does something stupid and spirals into anxiety. Angeal has to wing it again to help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has not been betaed

” _Something happened between me and Angeal. It scared me a little, but I think it was exactly what I needed. It makes me even more determined to prove myself worthy of Angeal’s guidance_.”

The day after their ‘discipline’-session, Zack got up early and made Angeal a huge breakfast. None of them mentioned the ‘disciplining session’, but Zack’s gratitude sweetened the air of their little home with his easy affection.

For the next week or so, Zack’s mood was exceptional, and everyone around him delighted in his company. It was brought to Angeal’s attention by official channels and gossip alike, and it undoubtedly cast him in a good light too as Zack’s mentor. It was all likely; Zack spread his good spirits around like sprinkles everywhere he went when he was happy. It was Zack’s very own magic, and it had nothing to do with Mako.

When Angeal left for his next mission, he thought nothing of it. There wasn’t anything out of the ordinary either with the mission itself or leaving Zack a few days.

The message that was relayed to him, informing him that Zack had put a VR-room out of commission, _that_ was extraordinary. It caused him to openly gawk at the screen of his PHS on the train back to Midgar. This was not how he’d planned to start his weekend.

His mind had circled anger, disappointment and pure bafflement three times over, between the platform of sector seven and the Shinra tower. It wasn’t like Zack to do something like this.

On his way up in the elevator, severe worries struck. What if Zack wasn’t home? What if he’d taken off again?! Where would he go? He’d barely had the thoughts before starting a list in his head of people to call. He was still making it as he barged into the apartment.

“Zack?” he called, his voice coming out far more forceful than he meant.

He rushed to check Zack’s bedroom first, finding the bed neatly made which was a rare occurrence at best. He didn’t bother to check his own room, passing it only to chuck his duffle bag inside. The sight greeting him in the living room made him halt in his steps.

On the carpet in front of the sofa Zack sat kneeling, his back deeply rounded and the bare feet sticking out entirely blue.

“For the love of Gaia, Zack, what are you doing?” he blurted, hurrying to his student.

Deep dark circles framed Zack’s eyes, his lips were chipping, and he refused to lift his gaze.

“’m waiting, sir,” he mumbled, the grovel in his voice betraying a long silence.

A cold chill struck Angeal like lightning, his alarm growing with every second where he stood, frozen before his ward.

“How long?”

Zack's knuckles whitened as one hand clutched the other.

“ _How long_?” Angeal could hear his frustration getting masked as anger. Rage even.

“Yesterday, sir,” Zack replied quietly, shrinking in on himself.

“Have you lost your mind?”

Zack shook his head. It made his entire form sway, making it look like he could topple over with the gust of a breath.

“Whatever for? You and Kunsel had the disciplinary meeting on Thursday! _Thursday_!” 

The notice had said they’d been let off with a warning. Pranks were hardly unusual. It was unfortunate that the VR room had been taken out of commission, but the software had been easily restored by a technician the following day. Zack would have to do extra shifts to make up for the service fee, but there were no additional ramifications.

“You, sir.”

“What about me? Get up!”

He wanted to bend down, wanted to shake some sense back into his ward, but he looked like he’d break at the slightest touch. He hadn’t invited it, but he could feel adrenalin course into his blood. It wasn’t anger, but shock at Zack putting himself through _this_.

“No.”

“What do you mean no?!” It was a struggle not to shout every word, and it startled him. He wasn’t easily upset.

“Please,” Zack begged, his voice resonating with quiet, relentless determination that alarmed Angeal further, “please let me make it up to you, sir.” Then he folded over, his forehead nearly touching Angeal’s boots.

Angeal couldn’t believe his eyes, and for a moment he just stood there gaping. Then it was his turn to recover his sense, sinking and pulling Zack into a crude embrace. Never, _never_ had he thought he’d find his Puppy so distraught.

But the comfort he ached to offer wasn’t received well. At first, he thought Zack merely grunted from the stiffness of his legs, but as soon as he regained some composure he tried to squirm away.

“Let go. Please, _please_!” Zack gasped with all the desperation his tired limbs couldn’t convey.

“On sofa. That’s an order,” Angeal said with the entire weight of his command to rule out any protests.

With sore huffs Zack scrambled himself into the sofa, leaving Angeal feeling lost on the floor.

“My gods Zack.” He deflated into a heap and leaned his forehead against Zack’s knees. “I don’t know what to do with you.” 

He’d hadn’t felt anything like this since he and Genesis were new in Shinra, and it was not a feeling he was keen to re-visit.

“Do what you did before, please sir,” Zack whispered, tentatively placing his hand on Angeal’s head.

There was no mistaking what Zack was referring to. There had only been one incident that would need to be brought up in such a roundabout way. He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t cross lines like that with Zack again, yet here he was, having no idea how to refuse. The lightness of Zack’s touch was somehow devastating, as if it lacked all substance.

“Alright, but only after you’ve eaten and your circulation is restored,” he sighed.

“I don’t-,” Zack began a feeble protest.

“Did you consider it would reflect poorly on me if my student neglected his well being? What if my mission would have been delayed? Were you planning on sitting there until the tissue damage was permanent?” The longer Angeal spoke, the more frustration crept into his voice.

Zack didn’t reply but withdrew his hand from Angeal’s hair, as if his permission to touch had been revoked.

“Did you?” Angeal growled, arranged his face, sat up and carefully began coaxing blood back into Zack’s legs.

“No sir,” Zack whispered.

“Then you have no right to complain.”

He fixed his heavy gaze on Zack, looking for clues as to why his pupil had chosen this course of action, but all he could see was Zack’s increasing discomfort at being touched. It was a stark contrast to the Zack he knew and had come to expect. The one who loved _touch_ almost to the point of it being a character flaw.

“Is it painful? Do you need a cure?” 

“It’s not that,” Zack answered, looking convicted and leaning further back on the sofa, trying to get away.

“You feel that undeserving?” He could feel the frustration take hold of his voice, hardening it to hide more complicated things.

Zack looked away, but Angeal understood him perfectly. They certainly weren’t strangers any longer.

“Take it as part of your punishment then,” Angeal muttered and clasped his hands harder around Zack’s legs and pulled down, wringing a wretched whimper out of his student.

Oddly, the sentiment of punishment seemed to put Zack at ease; there were no more protests. Angeal kneaded the legs until Zack was cringing from pins and needles that indicated that the circulation was getting restored.

With a heavy sigh he made it back to the hallway to take off his boots, and then into the kitchen to make his unruly charge a meal. While prepping the food, he wracked his brain over how to bear ‘discipline’ Zack, when the silly Puppy had been so harsh on himself already.

He poured a large bowl of rice soup and took it to the living room where he found Zack sprawled on the sofa, half asleep.

“Hey.” He gave Zack’s shoulder a gentle shake. At first, Zack stirred with a little smile on his lips, but as he came to it quickly faded. He looked positively bristling, taking the soup.

Metal clinking against porcelain filled the silence while Zack ate. Usually it was easy between them, but now it was bordering on unbearable. Angeal still didn’t know what to do as he took Zack’s emptied bowl and set it aside. He only knew he wanted this over as fast as possible.

“On the floor, Puppy.”

It was a relief no lingering stiffness showed in Zack’s movements as he got onto his knees again. Mako was a blessing and a curse. The memory of his own training gave him an idea.

“Get into a plank position and hold it.”

It was with sure, practised movements Zack took the position.

“Good. I’m going to put a timer in your PHS to go off once per hour. You will rest for one minute and then resume. I’ll check in with you later. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir,” Zack said, with purpose returning to his voice and spreading from there.

It was a relief to be back in familiar territory Angeal thought as he closed the door to his room. Never in his wildest dreams would he expected to shut something in his own apartment out for some peace of mind.

He sat on the edge of his bed and remained seated for far longer than he’d intended, just staring out the window. From this angle, nothing of the city below could be seen. Only a pale blue sky, slightly dimmed by the fumes of Mako.

His mind kept wandering back out the door. Usually, he liked to rest after a mission, even a standard one, but the restlessness drove him to the gym. When he finally made the shower a couple of hours later, he wasn’t really there either. His mind was in his living room, with Zack.

Thoughts roiled. How was he doing? How much of a toll had his body taken with the lack of food? Was he thirsty? Was he making it worse? What else could he have done? 

Zack had only been alone for three hours when Angeal couldn't keep himself from checking in. He stood in the doorway, appraising Zack’s condition before he approached. The pulse was sound, and only the lightest tremors could be seen. No sweat to mention and only a slightly elevated respiratory rate. It was all balm to his freighted nerves.

But Zack could do with water he decided and brought some from the kitchen.

“How are you doing?” Angeal asked, sitting down cross-legged in front of Zack.

“Good, sir.”

“Take a break and drink.”

Zack sat up but looked hesitant when he took the water. His sips were oddly small.

“Need to go?”

The question flushed Zack’s face a deeper shade of red than three hours of planking had.

“Go on then, but crawl. Leave the door open.” Angeal dished out the instructions with ease.

He eyes trailed Zack’s swaying behind as he took off towards the bathroom. Things were going well. Zack seemed content. No hint of any permanent damage. All that remained was letting Zack wear himself down, just like a real puppy. He only realised he’d been smiling from the curious look Zack gave him coming back.

“I’ll be back later,” Angeal said, putting on his stern instructor’s voice. Many found it intimidating, but not Zack. It always managed to sharpen his attention though.

The rest of the afternoon passed quicker. Angeal managed his coveted nap, to tend to his plants and even some paperwork. He returned to the living room in the evening, finding Zack much more strained. His standard-issue knit was soaking wet and sweat was pouring in rivulets down his arms. His pulse was quick but healthy, and his breathing to match.

He sat down on the floor next to Zack in silence and turned on the TV. The longer he sat there the lighter his mood became. His attention strayed from one thing to another until it landed on the quivering form beside him. In it, he found the reason. It was simply having Zack back under his wing, within sight, knowing that he was safe and sound.

On a whim, he fetched a damp washcloth from the bathroom to wipe some of the sweat off. No one liked it getting into their eyes.

“Keep going,” he murmured over the excited chatter of two women on the gardening show. He carefully brushed Zack’s hair away and wiped a line down Zack’s nose with the back of his index finger, one cloth’s thickness between them. Next, he dabbed it to Zack’s eyes and drew a broad line across his forehead.

It wasn’t an unusual thing to do. Everyone paired up in SOLDIER for physical training. It was efficient. They were encouraged to help each other out in every way possible. But in the light of the flickering TV, it seemed an unusually intimate thing to do. 

Perhaps Zack thought so too, because he lifted his head and gave Angeal an indecipherable look between huffs. Angeal returned with a smile and raising eyebrows, challenging his Puppy to question him, but it didn't happen.

Re-draping the washcloth, Angeal brought it to Zack’s bare shoulder and traced a trail of sweat pouring down Zack’s arm. He felt the muscles coursing with the strength of youth, mako and willpower, rising and falling along the path he followed.

He repeated the action, choosing another path, and then for the other arm, until it seemed the paths were a maze he’d gotten lost in. The skin was smooth and soft, even though the washcloth. The tremors changed to an earthquake as he wiped close to the armpit. Zack whined uncertainly between his heavy breaths. No hair, just a hidden expanse of warm skin. He could-,

“Ang?” Zack huffed.

Angeal hummed absent-mindedly, slow to tear his mind from his task.

“Wanna get it off?”

It took a few seconds before Angeal realised Zack was talking about his top. It looked mighty uncomfortable where it stuck and sagged.

“Sure,” he mumbled without thought.

It wasn’t uncommon for SOLDIER’s to train with bared upper bodies. The two of them had done it together countless times when the weather was hot, especially outside of Midgar, if they could train out in the open.

But the wet knit fabric felt different under his fingers as he pulled it little by little, freeing it from the waistband of Zack’s fatigues. It felt rare and new, though it was exactly the same as his own, save a different colour. He hitched it up as high as he could, feeling a rare thrill at accidentally brushing up the steep curves of Zack’s sides, making him flinch and shiver. With a gentle nudge, he gestured for Zack to raise one of his arms through the floor and thread it out, and then the other.

The seams creaked under the strain and Zack’s breathing became more rapid. The top ruffled black, damp strands as it was pulled over Zack’s head. It was carelessly put to the side.

Suddenly the uncovered beauty in front of Angeal seemed surreal and out of place. Was he truly allowed to have that in his life? He had to look away because it made his chest contract and his breathing painful.

Instead of reflecting on it, he let his autopilot take over. He did what he’d done for hundreds of cadets and SOLDIER’s alike. He got up and started correcting minuscule flaws in Zack’s position.

It only took the lightest touch to get Zack to rotate his hips and firm up his calves. He ran his hands firmly along the lines of Zack’s neck, to put some external rotations into the shoulders. Zack’s skin felt slick and sticky at the same time, cold to the touch, but ready to warm under his palms. Everything about his Puppy was lovely. The loveliest, in fact.

Zack let up quiet little groans, and he properly whined as he was made to push his chest further away from the floor.

“Getting tired Pup?”

“No,” Zack huffed stubbornly under his breath. It sounded like a challenge.

“Really?” Angeal felt a grin form on his face. Perhaps it wasn’t the kindest thing to do, but it was past dinner time already, and they had to fit another meal in before sleep. It was time to speed things up.

So he did what many SOLDIER’s did to one and other, to tease and test the limits of their bodies. He pressed down on Zack’s lower back as if testing the padding on a piece of furniture, earning an unhappy grunt full of anticipation. He shifted his weight slowly as he sat down on Zack, giving him time to adjust, forcing Zack’s grunt to a growl.

“Ssh,” soothed, lowering his hand to knead Zack’s shoulder. He was struggling now, and it was lovely to see Zack taking on any task. He always put his all into them. It would be wise not to, and he thought about ways to teach Zack to prioritise more mindfully.

At the moment, he couldn’t mind though. The tremors under him were too scrumptious, the rugged breath’s too enticing, the warmth too catching. He skimmed the nape of Zack’s neck, feeling the shivers spreading to himself. He tried to think of ways to tell Zack it was alright to stop. Alright to give up sometimes. Alright to reach one’s limits. 

Underneath him, Zack’s breaths seemed bordering on painful. How long was Zack going to keep it up? Did he want to find out? He could hear the sweat dripping to the floor. He lovingly stroked the back of Zack’s neck one more time.

“Down Puppy,” he said hoarsely as he leaned forward and stood up.

Zack collapsed unceremoniously to the floor, shivering, glistening and breathless.

“I could have,” Zack fought for air, “gone for longer.”

Angeal scoffed. “On your back, soldier.”

He plucked the blanket off the sofa, rolled it up firmly and helped slide it under Zack’s shoulder blades as he turned around. The unabashed moan when he slowly pressed down on Zack’s shoulders to open up his chest pierced him, reached his bones and made them rattle.

“And what would you have gained from that?” The words left him colder than intended.

Truly, he felt anything but cold as Zack’s heaving breaths washed over him in puffs. The air was filled with them, along with the faint scent of Zack’s exertion, his damp, unwashed hair. They filled his _home,_ and he couldn’t imagine it without Zack’s presence any more.

The rebellious glare in the blue eyes faded quickly, replaced by dejected surrender as Angeal’s question struck its target. Zack’s unmade face shifted to soft surprise when Angeal jostled his head into his lap and large hands began combing through his hair.

“Listen to me, Zack. You are absolutely forbidden to do anything that may cause unnecessary harm to yourself again. It is your duty to take care of yourself as well as I do. If you find yourself lost, you will wait for my instruction, until you don’t need it anymore.”

Zack pulled in air as if preparing to speak, but Angeal deflated him by grabbing a persuasive fistful of black spikes before he had a chance.

“Do _not_ argue against me in this.”

It was a relief to see Zack cringe from his tone. Pleasing even, given it was the most important thing he’d ever asked from his ward.

The dangers of their work, the constant uncertainty, the monsters, political struggles, _the wars_ , he could deal with all of them. He couldn’t bear the thought of Zack coming to harm by his own hands, not while under his roof. He let his grip in Zack’s hair soften, returning to their benign attention.

“Do you understand?” he asked, needy for Zack’s confirmation.

“I do, sir,” Zack mumbled with closed eyes, hiding from Angeal’s piercing gaze. He wasn’t hiding from Angeal’s touches though, because he reached to steal a hand from of his hair and pressed it down over his chest.

“I do, Angeal. I’m sorry,” he whispered, with desperation bleeding from every syllable.

“Puppy…” Angeal mumbled, splaying his hand wider over the clammy skin.

He felt oddly stuck in the moment. Unable to do less or more, though he wanted one of them. He wanted to turn back time to have a do-over, because at this point, _this one_ , what could he possibly do from here?

He wanted to scoop his Puppy into his arms and shelter him from anything that could knit those lovely brows into a frown. Wanted to hide him from the world and spoil him rotten. Wanted to keep him as a secret, only for himself, and for Zack of course. He sighed.

“I want a collar,” Zack said, breaking the moment with his light hearted request, giving the first hint of his carefree self returning.

A collar? Those damned Shinra dress shirts with their detachable collars. Of course Zack would lose it. But when? Zack hadn’t worn that in ages.

“When did you last see it?”

“What?” Zack’s eyes flung open, filled with amusement. “I meant like a collar… for a dog.” His voice seemed unbothered, but not only could Angeal see the blush, but he could also feel it perfectly under his palm.

The way Zack bit his lower lip trying to hide his grin didn’t escape him either. He should say no. Should pass. It was a terrible idea. Terrible and so very, very _devastatingly_ tempting. He barely dared to picture it in his mind, for all the potential effects the idea could have.

Zack kept one of his hands pressed over his own, and slid light, moist his fingers up his wrist with the other. The touch efficiently short-circuited his brain.

“Why?” Was not at all what he’d mean to say.

Zack’s face turned serious. “So I know you’ll keep me,” he said quietly.

The pulse against his palm was like a hammer, and Zack’s blue eyes were bottomless pools.

“Keep you?” Angeal echoed, not understanding. The penny dropped long seconds later.

“Of course I’m going to ‘keep you’.” The words formed funny in his mouth, as if they shouldn’t be strung together in that order. Shouldn’t be said with those relations. _Shouldn’t_ _need to be said at all_.

“Prove it. You said I could ask for things in return. I’m asking for a collar.”

“Alright.” Shit. Shit shit shit. _Shit_.

“Thank you,” Zack murmured contentedly and stretched his arms overhead, loosely placing them around Angeal’s waist. He stretched himself out with a half yawn, half groan, no doubt feeling stiff.

Angeal looked down on his Puppy in wonder, because it was a wonder that one of Gaia’s lovelies creatures now rested so comfortably in his lap. Zack’s trust, loyalty and resoluteness were the greatest gifts of his life, and though he was aware, he didn’t know what to do with them. So he thought of something else.

“Zack?”

“Hmm?”

“What were you and Kunsel doing in the VR rooms?”

“Uhm.” Angeal could feel Zack’s hands fidget behind his back. “We… We thought it would be funny if the VR-troops,” Zack swallowed, rapidly returning to a distinct shade of crimson, “would be naked.”

One, two, three beats of silence passed before Angeal burst with rumbling, hearty laughter. Zack peered up at him cracking slowly, and then joined in with uncharacteristic, timid laughter of his own.

They remained there on the floor for a long time, but that was fine. None of them wanted to get away from there anyway. Dinner turned very late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a good weekend! <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zack receives a gift from Angeal and tries it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has not been betaed.

“ _I did something stupid again. I didn’t really think about it at the time, but I could have hurt myself. Angeal was so angry when he came home. I was sure he would get rid of me. Nothing has ever scared me like that didt. I don’t know how to believe him when he says I can stay, so I asked for the only thing I could think of. I don’t think he liked it.”_

  
Angeal sat on his velvet sofa, turning the box in his hands. He’d been out shopping with Sephiroth out of all people, but he was the only person he could trust with keeping a level head about whatever was happening with him and Zack. He needed to confide in _someone_. This was already over his head.

For all of the rumours about his strictness, Sephiroth was very unjudgmental about these things. Surprisingly knowledgeable too. He’d known exactly where to get a high-quality collar for what he’d called ‘pet play’. Though Sephiroth’s eyes hadn’t been void of curiosity or unvoiced laughter when Angeal had told him about Zack’s request.

The company had made shopping for Zack’s collar a deeply satisfying experience. It had given him an opportunity to try out his thoughts with Sephiroth. Besides, it had been a long time since he’d felt connected to Sephiroth on a personal level.

Yet another thing that Zack had brought into his life. Still, it wasn’t without nerves he waited for Zack to come home. He’d asked for Zack’s direct return after class, announcing that he’d cook something special, which he now set out to do. It was just as well. Cutting vegetables always calmed him down. It had a soothing rhythmic quality to it. 

When Zack arrived, he came straight to the kitchen. With a soft ‘hi’ he crowded Angeal and stood on his toes to curiously peek over his shoulder. Angeal hadn’t liked it at all at first, but now it sent waves of warmth through him. So did the long stroke down his arm before Zack went on to take a shower and change.

What would the collar do? Would Zack want to put it on straight away? Of course he would. And then what would they do? Nothing? It didn’t seem likely. He’d asked Sephiroth and he’d said Zack might want to ‘play’. What the hell did that mean? Fetch? He… that… _No_.

Dinner was unusually stiff, and the silence spread out between their exchanges in a way it usually didn't. He could feel Zack’s curious glances whenever Zack thought he didn’t notice. Doing the dishes was awkward because he had butterflies in his stomach. Weren’t they supposed to be extinct?!

“Okay, what’s this about Angeal? Sir?” Zack asked with a giddy smirk. 

“Living room,” Angeal said, reluctantly admitting to himself that he was excited.

Zack went ahead. Angeal could see him pacing his steps to not seem eager, but his curiosity was one of the things he loved most about his Puppy.

He found Zack bending over the side table, looking at the grey box on top of it. But Zack politely took his seat on the sofa, not mentioning anything.

“Open it. It’s for you,” Angeal said, leaning against the doorway. There was something sweet about watching from across the room.

The way Zack picked up the box with care and the way the lid slid off the bottom with an even speed was incredibly satisfying. So was the soft rustle of the tissue paper and his Puppy’s eyes as the black collar was revealed. 

He’d kept it simple. Splurged on the dyed black Behemoth leather, and on Sephiroth’s recommendation, he’d chosen a design with a ring. He’d said the Puppy might want a leash, so that too was in the box.

For a moment Zack was frozen in time, and when he finally raised his eyes again, they were wet with tears. It was a strange sight because even as they fell across Zack’s cheeks, he was absolutely radiant.

“You got it for me,” he whispered.

“Of course I did.” He couldn’t help but smile. Zack always forgot to address him properly when he was moved or enthusiastic, or cheeky. It wasn’t proper, but he liked it that way. 

“Will you put it on?” Zack asked with unconcealed longing. 

Angeal hummed softly in confirmation as he walked up to Zack. The distance seemed unusually long, and he felt strangely aware of his own limbs as they carried him across the room.

Zack rose with the box, holding it with fingertips only as if he didn’t want to touch more of it than necessary. Up close, Zack’s radiance was like a warm wind caressing him, and whispering little forbidden secrets as it stirred the air.

He took the collar from the box, and undid the buckle. The evident charge in the air should have made him hesitate, but it didn’t do anything of the kind. Instead, he slowed down to savour it. Savour the way was Zack drinking his every movement with those clear blue eyes, his pupils growing wider and wider.

The box was carefully set down on the side table, and then Zack stood before him with little shallow breaths. He looked solemn and reverent, expectant, almost to the point of being anxious.

Angeal took pity, stepping closer to wipe away the tracks of tears with the pad of his thumb from those lovely, lightly rose tinged cheeks. Zack’s eyelashes fluttered, and brighter colour erupted in the wake of his touch.

It looked as if Zack’s pupils would swallow his entire irises or more. Perhaps they’d swallow them both. It’d be hard to mind if they did. 

“Wait,” Zack breathed and took half a step backwards.

His eyes never left Angeal as he grabbed the hem of his jumper and pulled it overhead. The movement was slow and deliberate, almost seeming ritualistic to Angeal. The way Zack decisively dropped the jumper on the floor, tore something in him.

When Zack stepped closer again, the collar had a weight like lead in his hands. He raised it to Zack’s neck, taking in Zack’s increasingly softening expression. The way Zack's head fell back, then forward to make space for his hands closing the buckle behind his neck. Zack’s eyes softly falling half-closed and his mouth falling half-open.

Angeal knew he was experiencing one of the most incandescent, beautiful moments of his life. The thought that it would soon be over outright pained him, and he couldn’t bear removing his hands. Instead, his fingers sought skin and the soft little hairs at the back of Zack’s neck.

A quiet gasp fell from Zack’s lips, but it resounded in Angeal, loudly echoing its message of dizzying pleasure.

“Puppy,” the bordering on offensive pet name formed as a smitten summoning. 

There was nothing sudden or forceful about the way Zack closed the distance between them, but the closeness crashed into Angeal’s senses with violence anyway. Zack’s intense, heavy gaze on him was an assault, and so was his warm, depthless breaths. Light, shivering hands on his hips pulled them as close together as possible without zipping the length of their bodies against each other.

“You have to keep me now,” Zack murmured in a way that didn’t reflect his piercing, almost demanding gaze.

It was too much, and in a desperate attempt to compromise, Angeal placed his mouth against Zack’s hair to try to sate his need to validate Zack. 

“Wouldn’t need a collar for that, silly Puppy,” he mumbled with his heart in his throat.

The soft black strands were an onslaught on his lips. Warm skin turned warmer under his fingertips, and he didn’t dare to move away. Didn’t trust himself with what he would do next.

“’Geal," Zack breathed.

It was gratitude, relief and devotion. Under that, he knew too well that it was a plea. Zack’s hands slid further around him, grabbed his belt and tugged. Not demanding, but making his wishes known. 

It was the sweetest temptation Angeal had ever experienced, though he wasn’t entirely sure what it was for. Yes, the urge to pick Zack up and wrap his legs around his hips was there, as was the impulse to crush Zack into his chest. He ached profoundly for wanting to taste Zack, to pry those lips open and stroke them with his tongue. There was no doubt in his mind that Zack would have let him have his way if he would choose it.

But he had reasons to resist. All of that would surely be heavenly in and of itself, but there was something different about the nuances of what was unfolding between them. He had a nagging feeling that it wouldn’t be enough. It would be like scratching a mosquito bite with a garden rake.

So, he planted another kiss in Zack’s hair and leaned away. “What happens now, Puppy?”

There was no offence to his question in Zack’s face. Only warm, open acceptance. He smiled and shrugged easily, seeming perfectly comfortable with whatever would happen next. The moment stretched agreeably, until finally, the Puppy suggested watching TV, just like normal. 

It wasn’t quite normal the way that Angeal sat down on the sofa, and how Zack sat down on the floor in front of him. At first, Zack leaned his back on Angeal’s shins, but as time went on Angeal’s legs drifted apart, and Zack hooked his arms comfortably over his thighs, taking place between his legs.

Soon, Angeal’s hands were deeply nestled in the black strands, and when they were bored of that, they moved on to the exposed skin, frequently skirting the deep black leather around Zack’s neck. The constant shivers it caused were delightful against his thighs. To have that much contact with Zack brought his body to a pleasant hum.

Zack rotated the collar around his neck, offering him the ring for the leash. “Pull,” he said without turning around. 

His hands brushed against Zack’s, and the small touch sent a wave of pleasure through him. He hooked his index finger in the ring and experimentally applied a minuscule amount of pressure, unsure of what Zack wanted.

“More,” Zack whispered, reached for his sweater to spread it over his lap like a blanket, and then gave Angeal’s foot an encouraging squeeze.

It didn’t elude him that Zack might be hiding something in his lap, and the thought _thrilled_ him. Visions of Zack -swelling - engorged - dripping -flickered by, and he wondered what hues Zack’s skin would take. Pinks? Reds? Purples? Warm, inviting browns? He told himself it didn’t matter. What harm could it do if Zack didn’t know that he knew? 

He increased the pressure on the collar, and it was easy to tell when he’d hit the right amount because Zack simply melted into him.

“Like that?” he leaned in and spoke into black strands, already knowing the answer, but wanting to hear it anyway.

His coveted reply came in the shape of a garbled mess; a moan, a ‘yes’ and a sigh. It sent him into a rare fit of laughter that had his Puppy turning to him in that dazed-but-strangely-alert-way he only knew from Zack.

“Are you happy?” Zack mumbled with a smile and ever-rosy cheeks, letting his head roll back against Angeal’s thigh.

“I am, thank you.”

He couldn’t remember when someone last had asked him that. Of course it would be Zack who did. As much as he cared about Zack, he never had a second to doubt Zack’s care for him. It had been there, steady and robust, from the moment he’d asked for Zack as his protegé.

“It suits you,” Angeal said, in the stead of other things he might have said.

Zack’s head grew heavier on his thigh, and he blinked slowly in the flickering light of the forgotten TV.

“Me, at the end of a leash for you, suits me?” Zack said with a widening grin on his face. 

Not fair. Not fair at all. He gave the collar a cautioning but playful tug. He expected Zack to laugh, but instead, his Puppy’s face fell slack with a decidedly suggestive moan. Their eyes locked immediately after, and an understanding passed between them.

Zack took a breath as if to say something, looking regretful and exposed, but Angeal smiled, shook his head and dragged the pad of his fingers over the bones of Zack’s cheeks. He loved the feel of that gentle curve. 

There was nothing that could be said anyway. What had passed between them had already passed, and now it was theirs to deal with. In a way, perhaps it was better that it was out in the open. 

“I’m sorry Zack, I should have said no.” It was his responsibility, and here they were, soaking, getting wetter by the second, in his failure.

“I wouldn’t have let you, Angeal.” 

Gods, his name sounded lovely coming out of Zack’s mouth. Zack took his hand, the one that wasn’t still applying pressure to the collar and placed it over his chest. Such a tender Puppy. So warm and generous, in every way.

Angeal hummed low, pretending to accept Zack’s answer. Of course he could have resisted. He could have handed Zack’s training to someone else. He still could, in theory. In practice, he knew it was impossible. The beating heart under his palm was far too precious to him, and he realized he’d do many things to keep it.

On an impulse, he sought to dig his fingernails into Zack’s chest and raked up it, as if he could rake Zack into himself, or perhaps to open him up for more to pass between them. More warmth. More need. He received it in the shape of a strangled whine and softly fluttering black eyelashes.

It made him undeniably fill out inside his fatigues. He wondered if Zack would notice. If he’d only twist his head a little his mouth would practically be on him.

But Zack kept his eyes closed to ride out his shallow breaths. When he had, he flashed a vexing smile, sat up again, giving the appearance of turning his attention to the TV. Angeal was left with a sense of bereavement. He hadn't been ready for the moment to end.

He noticed damn well that Zack’s pulse wasn’t slowing under his palm and the way that Zack was frequently shifting, but never away from him. It mirrored his own restlessness perfectly. He waited until the only thing that existed was the aching skin of his hand against Zack’s chest.

When it became too much, his hand began to wander, ever so carefully exploring with a touch so light it let him pretend it barely existed. Zack seemed to catch on, because he too waited to put a soft curve in his spine, one that opened his chest out beautifully, offering more of himself.

Zack’s skin was flawless and impossibly soft. Stretched over perfect, developing muscles that Zack seemed to wear with as much pride as he felt in his having a hand in Zack’s training. At least in that Angeal thought of them as equals.

His underwear felt restrictive. If Zack were to lean his head back, he’d notice, and the thought made his stomach flip. 

Delicate fingers skimmed over the back of his hand, sanctioning the way he traced every dip and rise of Zack’s chest. He mindfully kept skirting the dark circles of flesh, and after a while, he could feel the minuscule way his Puppy tensed up every time he got too close.

For a while, it was like a game. How close did he have to be to get a reaction? He wondered if they were hard or soft. He guessed hard, but the skin was so warm. He wanted hard. Zack’s heart was like the drum of a marching band; so deep and steady it filled the room. It beat against his ears until he thought he was going deaf.

The familiar sound of the eleven o’clock news jingle reminded him that time was a thing. With great reluctance, he traced his hands up to the collar and traced the skin under it. Zack shivered for him.

“It’s late.” The sound of his own voice pulled Angeal further back into reality. 

“No, it’s Friday,” Zack replied with a near whisper as if he didn’t want to stir the air too much.

The answer somehow dragged all the heat back into Angeal, and his hands sought Zack’s shoulders, his collar bones, and this time he let them glide right down over Zack’s nipples. The hard nubs tore at his palms and frayed his mind.

Zack _whined_ and gave a full body shudder.

He hoped it obscured his own sharp breath. He did his best to seem unmoved as he leaned down, his hands continuing down over abs and his face ending up in Zack’s hair. He took a deep breath and planted a kiss against strands that tickled his face.

He couldn’t remember the last time he felt this content. It was a dangerous thing though because, after the way their evening had gone he could picture many, many things that would make him more contented yet.

“It’s bedtime, Puppy,” he repeated, making himself sound stricter than he felt. He wished he could drain Zack’s essence through his palms, put it in a bottle and drink it.

“Okay. Take it off then,” Zack whispered and pressed himself back against Angeal’s thighs. 

Angeal hummed. It felt like every part of his being protested as he sat up, and his fingers started working the buckle of the collar open. It was worse than the times he’d been knocked out on the battlefield. There would be no potion to take the edge off of _this_.

Zack cleared his throat, but his ‘Goodnight’ still sounded hoarse when he said it. He stood up and walked straight to the bathroom without turning around. Even if it was for the best, Angeal felt bothered. As if the way their night ended didn’t honour what their night had been.

He fingered the buttery, still warm leather in his hands. It had long since cooled when he put it back in the box and left it on the side table for Zack to pick up later.

That night he woke up drenched in sweat. Irritated, he tossed the comfort off and got up to step out on the balcony for some air. It was there he heard it, and that made sense. The walls were soundproofed to SOLDIER standards, but the windows were not, and Zack’s room was right next to his. 

Through the stuffy Midgar summer air, he could hear Zack gasping for air. He could hear the soft, muffled whines, as pure as they were filthy and the familiar sound of a fist around thick and slippery flesh. He had half a mind to go back indoors, to give Zack the privacy he was entitled to. 

Before he'd had the chance, the next sound that rippled through the air hit him like a punch in the guts, making him crouch down where he stood. He’d never have expected his own name whispered to affect him so. The way it had spilled from Zack's lips made his whole world spin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have a good, smutful weekend <3
> 
> A fellow smut-writer has graced me with the nickname of Sailor Anguish. Apparently she found it 'a theme' in my writing..... yep.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angeal is conflicted, but finds a thinly veiled compromise with which he engages Zack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to smut-territory, gang. 
> 
> This has not been betaed.
> 
> Oh, I've been moving around the intro- diary excerpts to the chapters. Please excuse me while I get them in order.

_”Angeal gave me this gift. I asked for it, but I didn’t really think he’d get it for me. I love it so much. I got to try it on and it was the happiest I've ever been. If I’m worried about something I take it out and just hold it. It reminds me of how much Angeal cares for me. It makes me feel like I can do anything.”_

The next day Angeal hurried out of the apartment before Zack had a chance to wake. He wasn’t exactly impressed with himself, but there was no way he could face Zack after hearing him do that, thinking of him. It was too much, and he was being entirely unprofessional about it.

He stayed out of the flat until after midnight, and then he practically snuck into his own apartment, not to draw attention to himself. He wasn’t proud of that either. The next morning, he hoped to be himself again.

He wasn’t. He woke up giddy and nervous, a feeling he hadn’t expected to relive since his childhood Yule days. He scoffed at himself, tried to scrub his stupidity off himself in the shower. Tried to drown it in his tea while cooking breakfast.

“Missed you yesterday,” Zack slurred, stepping into the kitchen in his pyjamas, rubbing his eyes. 

Angeal snorted tea out of his nose and stood coughing over the sink. Zack’s pyjama top only had two buttons closed and they were mismatched. It was adorable, of course; it was Zack, but all he could think of was Zack’s warm skin under his fingers. 

“You okay?” Zack asked, a little more awake. He walked up to Angeal and gave a few firm whacks to his back.

“Yes of course,” Angeal said, still coughing. “Breakfast is ready. I have to go.”

“Already?” Zack’s hand stroked down his arm, and his grip lingered hesitantly. 

“Yes. I’ll see you later.” Angeal could feel himself looking at Zack’s hand as if it was offensive. It wasn’t, but he couldn’t stop.

“Tonight?” Puppy eyes. Damned puppy eyes.

“Maybe. We’ll see.” He squeezed Zack’s wrist fondly before he lifted it off and walked out of the kitchen. He could feel Zack’s disappointment chasing him like a bloodhound.

“I’ll text you,” he shouted over his shoulder.

And he did. He texted Zack to tell him he’d been called away on a four-day mission. He didn’t disclose that he’d requested it. Disappointment bled through his screen. He swore and dialled up Sephiroth to ask for support, permission, advice. Whatever. Something.

“If he wants it, what’s the problem?” Sephiroth said in his usual, impassive way.

Angeal huffed in frustration. “Well, I’m his teacher!”

“So? Do you think he’ll stop learning if the two of you get closer?” He could practically hear the quotation marks around ‘get closer’. 

“No.” Zack wasn’t like that. 

“Do you think Shinra will care if they find out?”

“Maybe! I don’t know! Will they?” Sephiroth would have a better insight but he doubted it would be a real issue.

“No.”

Fine. Angeal sighed heavily.

“I don’t understand your hesitation,” Sephiroth said, not sounding sympathetic to his worries at all.

“I can see that. Thanks!” He rolled his eyes.

“Apologies. That was not what you wanted to hear?” Shit. He hadn't meant to lash out, especially not at Sephiroth who was clearly doing his best to help. 

“No, it’s fine. It’s not on you.” Angeal pinched his brows, hard. 

“Maybe he’s like one of your plants.”

Oh, this he had to hear. He kept silent, waiting for Sephiroth to continue.

“Some grow best in narrow spaces?” 

“I suppose?”

“Maybe Zack is like that?”

Angeal could feel his brain cells fire so hard they killed themselves off trying to connect the dots. 

“Rootbound? Potbound? Just bound? Have you tried it? Binding him?” 

An awkward moment passed, and then Angeal burst out into desperate laughter. When Sephiroth joined in, sounding significantly calmer, something in him just unwound. It was such a rare thing to hear, and it was lovely. 

“I have not, but I will take your opinions into consideration. Thank you Seph. 

“Any time. Perhaps we should dine together soon?” Sephiroth inviting himself over for dinner was another absolute rarity.

“I would like that very much. Come and meet him.” 

“Alright then.”

He felt lighter when the call ended. Perhaps he was working himself up for no reason. He’d never do anything to hurt Zack, so why was he worrying so much? Even if they got close, it wouldn’t be the first time a student and a teacher did. It didn’t necessarily end poorly. Especially not in Shinra. It certainly wasn’t the moral centre of Gaia. He sighed.

‘Rootbound’. Even he could feel the silly smile on his face. It wouldn’t go away. He texted Zack with the details of his return so that he wouldn’t worry.

When he stepped into his flat on Friday afternoon, he heard a soft thump in the living room.

“Zack?”

“Here, sir,” Zack said calmly, but he sounded subdued. Distanced.

Angeal peaked into the living room as he was pulling off his boots. Zack was there on the carpet, kneeling with the box in front of him. There was tension in his shoulder, but no hint of exhaustion. Good.

He stacked his gear in the hallway, took out the box of freshly made Junon gumdrops he’d brought from his mission before he stepped into his home to join his ward.

He dropped the box on the side table, taking only a second before he decided to sit with Zack on the floor. Zack wouldn’t look at him. 

“I take it you didn’t have another adventure with Kunsel?” he said softly. He could already feel his chest filling with warmth. 

“No.”

Zack wrung his hands in his oddly slow way. They seemed to beg to be pried open and placed on something lovely. Something they could care for. He considered doing something to that effect but stopped himself. It had not been the way previously, and it surely wouldn’t be today either.

“Out with it then.”

“You’ve been avoiding me.” 

Shit.

“Did I do something to offend you, sir?” Zack calling him 'sir' was starting to chafe.

He inched closer and lifted his Puppy’s face. He let the warmth he felt for Zack fill his voice when he spoke. “No, you haven’t offended me.”

Zack tension was shed first with surprise, and then with relief. Yes, that was much better.

“Will you let me wear it, sir?” Zack asked with soulful eyes.

Angeal looked at the box with the collar. Zack still wanted to wear it? But nothing was wrong? He hadn’t done anything wrong? Then again, he hadn’t last time either. Perhaps it wasn’t all about discipline like he’d thought at first? Then what?

Perhaps Zack knew him well enough to read the questions in his eyes. “Keep me, sir,” is what he said. 

“Alright. Do you want it now or after dinner?” He could feel a devilish trait behind the smile growing on his face. “Puppies eat on the floor.” 

He combed his hand to Zack's hair to make sure it wasn't perceived as a threat. His heart skipped a beat when Zack smiled back at him. It was as bright as the first rays of dawn. 

“Now, please, sir.” 

“Alright, wait one minute,” Angeal said and jumped up to wash his hands. He didn’t want to touch either the collar or his precious Puppy with the grime of the outside world.

When he came back, he could see the difference in Zack's presence. The softened lines of Zack’s shoulders, the eyelids falling lower, the hint of a smile on his face. Everything about Zack gave away how much he wanted to wear that collar. 

As he sat back down Zack’s smile grew thicker, and he raised his arms above his head. It took Angeal a moment to realise he was expected to pull Zack’s top off. He thanked the gods for the stupid high collar on the uniform knit as he collected the fabric between his fingers and pulled it up.

There were a few blessed seconds where he could just look without being seen, and he delighted in them. He brushed black spikes from around the neck and reverently opened the box to get the collar. He’d thought it was a grotesque thing Zack had asked for at first, but now he thought nothing could have been farther from the truth.

When he placed it around Zack’s neck things clicked in place. He could read it in every line of Zack’s body. This was about being taken care of. He still couldn’t figure out exactly why it needed to be quite so formalised as this though.

“I got you Puppy,” he mumbled as he closed the buckle.

Zack looked up with his deep blue pools threatening to overflow. In the next heartbeat, Zack threw himself into Angeal’s arms.

“Thank you,” he repeated over and over.

“Ssh, Puppy. Ssh.”

He felt like he was sullying Zack with the outside grime that he hadn’t had a chance to wash off, but Zack’s was incessant. Zack all but climbed into his lap, and he did his best to press all of his caring into Zack’s immaculate skin.

“Let me take a shower. Are you hungry? How about an early dinner?”

“Okay,” Zack mumbled. Angeal felt his lips brush against his neck as he spoke. He loved the sensation but cringed from feeling filthy.

“Alright Pup. Wait here? I’ll be quick.” 

He practically peeled Zack off of himself and headed straight for the bathroom. The water that poured over him in the shower felt like bliss. As the layers of road dust and grime were washed away, he found unexpected excitement hiding underneath. Excitement for spending his evening with Zack. 

Though his conversation with Sephiroth had gone some way to put his mind at ease, he didn’t want things to speed out of hand. So in an attempt to calm himself down he took himself in hand and searched his memories for inspiration.

He thought of the adventurous mission nights out of town, but they seemed distant and dull. He tried his time before Shinra with Genesis, but as fond as those memories were, they hardly inspired the technical pleasure he was looking for. He thought of Sephiroth, and that always worked. It was as if the man was made out of pure sin. 

The memories of Sephiroth lost in helpless pleasure were some of his dearest ones. He tried to picture them clearly in his mind, and truth be told, it was never a challenging feat. It was probably one of the reasons they’d drifted apart soon after. It was hard not wanting more of Sephiroth after having had him, and it had affected their friendship more than he wanted to admit.

Pricks of shame stung him for using his friend like this. His thoughts drifted to the future instead. Perhaps it would be different now? He stroked himself thinking of the dinner, of introducing Zack to Sephiroth. 

From there, it wasn’t a leap to picture Sephiroth towering over Zack, who was kneeling on the floor in the living room. It would be such a beautiful image to have Sephiroth stroke Zack’s hair, his cheek. To have him playfully tugging the collar, pulling Zack closer to those leather pants.

And Zack, he would lose it. If Zack was adoring of him now, what would he be like actually facing Sephiroth? Everybody lost it with Sephiroth. Picturing Zack’s reaction was what had him gasp and shoot his load into his hand.

It was only after he’d realised he’d ended up thinking of Zack anyway, even though it was the one thing he'd set out not to do. He sighed, got out of the shower and dressed in soft pants and a plain white t-shirt.

Zack was waiting for him in that unlikely, easy, perfect stillness that he’d only seen when he’d been asked to kneel. He paused to take in the grace of it.

“Come on then,” he said, walking into the room and snatching the blanket off the sofa to bring it into the kitchen for Zack to sit on.

He already felt out of bounds when he heard Zack crawling after him. It wasn’t the crawling in itself, it was the enjoyment he got out of it. It was heady to be able to coax such serenity and orderliness from in Zack’s unruly mind.

“Here,” he said and dropped the folded-up blanket on the floor for Zack to sit on.

When Zack took his place with a cautious but peaceful smile, his loveliness hit him all over again, and he had to crouch down and tousle the shiny black strands.

“You’re such a good boy,” he said, knowing the words were severely lacking to express what he felt. Still, it fit the occasion well enough, and Zack’s cheeks flushed, his smile growing. His eyes lingered on the pretty, honey-toned skin before he made them turn to the fridge.

Well, Zack had chosen to eat on the floor. Good gods, he thought, his heart skipping beats, but this wasn’t a punishment. More like a reconciliation. This time the reason for the rift had been him, not Zack.

So, something that wouldn’t make a mess. Something bite-sized perhaps? Meatballs? That would work. He set to work while trying to figure out the sides. Now and then he stole glances at his Puppy, who’s eyes almost had a glazed over quality to them.

If the context would be removed, his face could adorn the pamphlets of meditation schools. How, how could he enjoy this so much? It seemed as impossible as it was improbable. But here they were, he and his ‘puppy’. He chuckled.

The best he could figure out for sides was cutting vegetables and greens and putting them on small skewers. He knew what it meant, but he was fairly certain Zack would enjoy it, and this was all about Zack after all.

He served himself on a plate, and filled a shallow bowl for Zack, along with a dipping bowl for the sauce. His excitement taking place at the table and beckoning for Zack to sit next to him on the floor almost frightened him. Clearly, the preventative measures in the bathroom had not helped much.

“Are you hungry?” he asked out of enthusiasm. He knew he was a good cook. 

Zack nodded with a shy smile. Angeal could see how Zack was expecting a bowl to be put down on the floor. He kept glancing at the spot where it had been before, but he had other plans. 

“Chew properly, okay?” he murmured, stuck a meatball on a skewer, dipped it in sauce and presented it to Zack. The surprised look on Zack's face was priceless, absolutely priceless. 

“Ang?” he breathed, looking up with disbelief from under his bangs.

“Go on then, Pup, or would you rather like a bowl?” 

“No,” Zack mouthed inaudibly, shaking his head for clarity, but he still looked stunned.

Zack inched closer with total focus, looking as if he was bracing himself, obviously struggling to overcome his self-consciousness. 

He had sympathy and waited patiently for Zack's mouth to open and close around the meatball to pull it off the skewer. Red tint bloomed on his Puppy's cheeks, and his eyes stuck to the floor. Angeal busied himself with a bite of his own to give Zack some space.

The taste of tender meat and fresh herbs spread beautifully in his mouth, and he felt it a privilege to share his food with his beloved student. 

“More?” he asked. Zack gave a shy little nod.

It was undoubtedly a sensuous affair, feeding Zack like this. The quality didn’t lessen over time, but they found a rhythm. At one point Zack’s lips brushed his thumb. If he’d had food in his mouth, Angeal was sure he’d have choked on it.

With a different mouthful, sauce dripped on Zack’s chin, and once onto his chest, and it was a luxury to wipe it off. Now and then he ran his hand through Zack’s hair, over his cheek or his shoulder in wordless encouragement. By the end of the dinner, Zack’s shyness had dusted blotches of pink over the bones of his chest.

“Are you full?”

This time Zack nodded with a smile that wasn’t quite on his lips, nor his eyes, it was like it came from his whole being. It sent a warm shiver down Angeal’s spine.

“Alright. Get ready for bed and join me in the living room.”

He could read the question in Zack’s eyes.

“Crawl. You may stand in the bathroom. Don’t close the door. Let me take off the collar. I’ll put it back after, okay?”

He could feel gratitude in Zack’s hands, the way they absentmindedly rested against his shins when he took the collar off. It was adorable and utterly charming.

The kitchen was quick work, and after drying his hands carefully, he picked up the collar, the blanket and went to sit down on the living room sofa.

His favourite gardening show provided a perfect background for letting his mind drift. It wasn’t as if he didn’t know, but he hadn’t thought about having a clear line of sight to the shower. The transparent shower curtain blurred the contours of Zack’s body, but he found himself staring at them, guessing them anyway.

He could see Zack’s hands running soap over his body, and he wondered how he’d been touching himself that night when he’d overheard him. It was a reflex to reach down and adjust himself in his underwear. It was then he realised how quickly he was filling them out.

Well, he sighed, it probably would have happened later anyway. He hid his hardness under a plush throw pillow, deeming it a safe bet. He tried not to stare when Zack pushed the curtain aside and stepped out of the tub. It shouldn’t be a big deal. They had seen each other naked before, he just hadn’t _looked_ then. 

It felt like a huge deal all of a sudden. Every time his eyes strayed from the TV, he found Zack blissfully unaware of him looking. To the point where he wondered if Zack was doing it on purpose. The way he bent down to thread his legs into his pyjama bottoms formed a perfect bow. 

Their eyes met when Zack got down on all fours just outside the bathroom threshold and seeing the anticipation in Zack’s eyes was like looking in the mirror. He petted the seat next to him and tried not to gawk when Zack started crawling.

When the collar was replaced around Zack’s neck, Zack jumped up onto the sofa and immediately threw his head on the pillow covering Angeal’s lap. How could he not have seen it coming? Why was he always so behind his game with Zack? And it was so obvious what Zack was going to do in hindsight too. 

But the pillow would be thick enough he supposed, in case excitement would flare up again.

“Want the remote?” he asked while pulling bent strands gently from under the pillow so he could stroke better through them.

“Sure.” Zack grabbed the remote and turned to his side to put on the cop-show he liked.

Zack’s choice of background noise, Angeal had come to understand. Were they hypocrites to sit here under the pretence of watching TV? But he wasn’t ready to have it turned off. He guessed perhaps Zack wasn’t either. 

“Can I have the blanket?”

They fussed with the blanket together to get it over Zack properly. Angeal was sad to see the skin covered, but it was still there for his touch. He busied himself with stroking it, looking for ways to make his Puppy shiver and sigh, but it wasn’t working as well as he’d hoped. 

“Want a gumdrop? I brought them for you.” 

“I brushed my teeth. Maybe later.”

Zack seemed to be in a pensive mood. However, he did sneak his hand under the pillow and rested it in a loose grip on Angeal’s thigh, just above the knee. Angeal found it unreasonably reassuring. 

One episode ended, the next one started playing automatically. Angeal had settled on drawing little circles into Zack’s shoulder when Zack abruptly paused the show.

“You never told me why you’ve been avoiding me.” Zack didn’t bother to hide his dejection. He kept looking at the frozen image on the TV.

Angeal hummed, trying to collect his thoughts. How should he explain?

“Why aren’t you getting your social needs filled from your classmates, Zack? And you have other friends too, don’t you?” He hoped ‘social needs’ would be enough to raise the topic without being too explicit. 

All Zack did was shrug.

“They all care for you. You’re very easy to like. I’m sure you are aware.”

A shrug and a sigh this time. 

“Why do you insist on thinking of me? I’m old and boring. All I do is sit here in front of the TV.” 

Zack huffed. “That’s not true,” he said, sounding offended, but his hand squeezed Angeal’s thigh. In comfort or protest, Angeal couldn’t tell.

“It is. I’m not sure what you think I could offer you.” He stroked Zack’s bangs out of his face to see better. Alright, anger it was.

“I’m not sure why you’re acting so guilty all the time.”

In a way, it was a relief to hear Zack talk back to him like this. It was painful, but at least it meant he could trust Zack to make himself heard.

“You shouldn’t get so attached to me,” he murmured. Perhaps he'd finally struck the heart of the issue?

“But I _am_ attached to you. We live together for Gaia’s sake. I _want_ to be attached to you!” Zack rolled over to his back. It was quite impressive how Zack could pin him down even though he was the one looking up. Few could pull that off. He hummed to buy some time.

“You haven’t answered me, _sir_.” Perhaps it wasn’t anger, just frustration, maybe even a hint of despair. It reminded Angeal that Zack had a right to know what was going on, especially if he was in pain over it. 

“I heard you by accident.” 

Zack frowned, the question persisting in his eyes.

“You were in your room. It was night, and I went out on the balcony for air and I heard you…” The words trailed off. He didn’t know how to finish the sentence. He hoped he didn’t have to.

And as expected, he saw plain as day as the penny dropped, and mortification filled Zack’s face.

“I’m so sorry,” Zack managed and he choked on his next breath. He looked away, terrified. “You must have been so disgusted.”

Disgusted? Angeal just stared down at his beautiful Puppy turning more panicked with every breath. Tears were flooding the deep blue pools. 

He took a firm grip on Zack’s shoulders and turned him to his back. “Stop. You’re letting your fears run away with you. I was not disgusted with you. If anything, it made me disgusted with myself.”

Zack choked on a sob and his eyes grew wide. He could see the glimmer of hope returning, but it had been at the cost of giving himself away. 

“Yourself?” Zack echoed quietly.

“I shouldn’t want you, Pup. You’re my student.” He brushed away Zack’s tears and watched his student struggle for a deep breath.

Things calmed down a little, and foolishly, he thought perhaps Zack was getting ready to turn on the show again. 

“Tell me how you want me.” Zack breathed in a plea, written more into his body than into his voice. It compelled all of the tension between them back to the surface.

Angeal looked down on the soft shapes of Zack. Zack’s hands were resting loosely on his own chest, just under the blanket. He wanted to see them move. 

“Close your eyes.” No, no that was not what he should have said, but Zack did what he asked. And now what? 

“Press your hands down.”

Zack did so too, with a soft crease forming between his brows. To see Zack's hesitance quashed by his trust went straight to Angeal’s head. He wanted _so much_. In a way, he felt as if he wasn’t steering himself anymore. He was just an onlooker, watching himself getting carried away. He couldn't stop wanting.

“Slide them down, Puppy.”

Zack missed a beat before he understood the instruction. He slid them to his stomach where they came to rest. It was good, but not perfect. He wrapped the blanket closer around Zack’s shoulders and tucked in the ends of it so it wouldn’t slip.

“Good. Hook your thumbs inside the waistband.”

Zack’s mouth fell open, and the frown deepened, just a little. 

“Ang?” Zack breathed. Angeal loved the way Zack breathed.

“Are you wearing underwear?”

Angeal looked at himself sternly and saw a lost cause. Zack nodded. His hair rustled against the pillow.

“Alright. Inside them too. Pull them down, slowly.”

“Ang?” Zack whimpered, confusion plain on his face even though he kept his eyes closed. 

“Ssh. I want to see. Show me?” His voice changed to a tone he hadn't heard for gods knew how long. He barely recognized it as his own. The movements under the blanket demanded his attention and made his heart pick up speed. So was Zack’s.

“Thank you Pup,” he murmured and shifted a little so that he could easier trace over Zack’s pretty cheekbones. He did it symmetrically while watching every delicious emotion flickering across Zack’s face. Zack trampled the bottoms off, and the breaths passing his lips turned shallow.

“I want you to run your hands over yourself in the way that makes you feel best. Can you do that?” he asked softly.

Zack swallowed, nodded and whispered a quiet ‘yes’. 

“You’re such a good, Pup. Run them over your hips and stomach.”

Blush spread down Zack’s neck as he was similarly directed to touch himself over his thighs and chest, and his stomach again. Angeal soaked in imagining what was going on under the blanket. At first, Zack’s movements had seemed jerky from embarrassment, but he could see it giving way. He hoped his presence provided the encouragement Zack needed.

“Does it feel good?” 

“Yes,” Zack said quietly.

“Feet on the sofa.”

Zack moved them heavily. 

“Let your knees fall apart.”

The shape under the blanket made Angeal think Zack was pressing his palms to his stomach as if to steady himself. He let his legs open with a soft whimper. Even to see this much was almost unbearable, and black spots entered Angeal's vision.

Blood was furiously redistributing itself to his nether regions, and he prayed that the pillow was thick enough. Not that he would mind if Zack noticed at this point. What worried him was what Zack would _do_ if he did. He could be very impulsive, and he didn’t want to risk-. Hypocrite, he told himself sternly. 

“With your index finger only, touch it.”

Zack’s knuckles made little moving bumps under the blanket, and then his Puppy wrung a delicious, strangled moan out of himself with such a small touch. His head pressed harder into the pillow as his hips lifted off the sofa. It wiped Angeal’s brain perfectly clean.

“Are you fully hard?” he asked in a hushed tone. 

“Yes,” Zack hissed helplessly from behind gritted teeth.

“Dripping?”

The whine was all the confirmation he needed. 

Arousal made Zack’s face sublime. It surpassed his wildest dreams to be allowed to see all this. It made his chest expand and contract in a way that seemed to stress his body with how much he wanted to stop time from moving. He wanted it to the point of it being painful. He hadn't known it possible to want something so much.

“Use your fingertips.” 

He caught every stutter in Zack’s breath with his eyes, his hearing, and through his thumbs still stroking Zack’s face. He loved the fine, downy hairs there.

“Ang,” Zack pleaded, evidently having worked himself up to tearless sobs.

Angeal wondered if he would get off from the diffuse pressure of Zack’s head in his lap.

“Are you ready to come, Pup?” He traced down Zack’s jaw and neck to lovingly stroke the skin around the collar. _His_ collar. _His_ puppy.

“I’ll make a mess,” Zack rambled between heaving breaths.

Angeal chuckled at the impression he must have left if Zack could worry about that at a time like this.

“It can be cleaned.”

He could hear the wetness and understood how Zack was pacing himself. It made him believe Zack wanted this to last too, and it was eye-opening. Perhaps he’d misjudged the lengths Zack would go for him. _Wanted_ to go.

Muscles tensed up under him, and he wanted so much to do more than only watch. He wanted to make Zack scream his pleasure. But for now, this felt safer. Technically, he still wasn’t doing much. 

Zack’s mouth opened wider to spill soft, strained little noises, many of them sounding like the beginning of his name. He wondered if it would come, or if Zack would be too insecure to repeat that particular action for now.

But things seemed to have plateaued. He felt a fresh stab of guilt for having brought Zack here and not exactly following through, so he slipped a hand underneath the blanket and spread his hand on Zack’s chest. It earned him a wonderful moan.

Spurred on, he let the thumb of his other hand skim the soft skin of Zack’s lower lip, just once, before he traced it down to the collar. He hooked his index finger underneath and applied pressure, just like Zack had asked him to do before. 

“Show me, Pup.” Giving such intimate instruction and having it followed was overwhelming.

Watching Zack was like watching a dam break, and suddenly everything about Zack unravelled. His stroking of himself became fast and erratic, and so did his breathing. He curled into the sofa, his leg dropped over the edge, his foot landing on the floor with a stomp. 

His hips lifted off the sofa and Angeal could see a lovely, rounded shape against the blanket which could only be the tip of Zack’s erection. Zack opened his eyes, revealing a burning gaze that sent electricity through them both.

Zack came with a strangled cry. His eyes rolled back in pleasure before they fell closed again and his body bowed fiercely up into Angeal’s hand.

“Good boy, you’re so good for me,” he mumbled reverently, doing his best to hold all of Zack in his palm. His other hand pet through black strands, taking the opportunity to press his hand into the pillow at the end of each stroke.

His own hardness was at the point of being painful, but he wouldn’t take his hands off of Zack for anything in the world. This was his time to savour every aftershock, to delight in every stuttering breath. The honour he felt in being allowed to partake in Zack’s pleasure overshadowed everything else.

Zack stuck one hand out from under the blanket and raised it into the air, in search of more contact. Angeal caught it, squeezed it and guided it so that he could kiss the delicate skin of his pulse point. It was deliciously moist against his lips. 

“Angeal,” Zack whispered with his brow knitting. Why were they doing that?

“I thought you didn’t like me enough,” Zack said with his voice growing thick.

When Zack opened his eyes, they overflowed again. With his hand like a hook around Angeal’s neck, he pulled down. Angeal lifted the pillow, put it down on the sofa and got himself down on the floor in order to follow where Zack led him. 

“Sometimes I wonder if you’re out of your mind, Pup. How could I not like you?” he mumbled into black hair, thinking Zack had gotten it _completely_ wrong.

“I’m sorry if I failed to show you.” Zack was still pulling around his neck, and understood Zack’s intention, but he wasn’t ready for that. 

“You didn’t. It’s just hard to believe sometimes.”

“Have a little faith,” Angeal mumbled tenderly.

He pulled Zack in for an awkward hug, given that Zack was still hiding his messy hand under the blanket. The thought of it being so close was dizzying. He would have gladly licked it clean. He loved Zack’s hands, why wouldn’t he love-. 

A deep intake of air in the crook of Zack’s neck revealed a heavenly warm glow, which made his aching desire known. He carefully shifted to press his hips into the side of the sofa, desperate for relief.

Zack was the one who broke the embrace, gently pushing him away. Apparently, he went too far and was grabbed by his T-shirt and pulled back. He knew what Zack was aiming for, but turned his head just enough to land his lips on Zack’s cheek instead of his mouth. He just wasn’t ready to take that step.

“What are you doing Angeal?” Zack asked in a way that was understandably vulnerable, but not entirely devoid of humour. 

Angeal hummed a chuckle and pressed his cheek into Zack’s.

“Have a little faith,” Zack whispered and withdrew enough to give Angeal a just and decidedly judgmental look. 

Angeal cocked his head in agreement, breathing in the deep blue pools while waiting for Zack to kiss him again, but it wasn’t what he expected. It was simply Zack brushing his lips against his. He stopped breathing to kill the groan that bubbled up in his chest and pressed his hips harder into the sofa. He worried that he’d slide it across the floor. 

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Zack murmured, with poorly concealed smugness. Still, it made Angeal feel pretty dumb. When had Zack ever tried to push himself on him?

“No, not bad.” 

“Can I do it again?”

“Mmh, and then I’m going to bring you some tissues.” He stroked his fingertips down along Zack's shoulder, pointedly trailing a little way down the arm that was still hidden beneath the blanket.

Zack made an adorable, embarrassed little groan, but his eyes sparkled like spring water in the sunshine. For a split second, Angeal considered pulling Zack's hand out. Maybe he could kiss the back of it? Find a clean spot? At least maybe then he could-.

The lips that brushed against him were sweeter now, more indulgent. They felt perfect against his. He wanted to feel them just a little longer, so he followed Zack’s movement, confident that Zack would let him without pressing for more. Then Zack’s hand was on his cheek, stroking along _his_ face for a change, and the tenderness stole his breath.

His lungs were stinging, his skin burned where Zack had touched and the whole world ached. It took all the willpower he had not to devour his Puppy right then and there. Instead, he took a deep breath, pecked Zack’s lovely lips goodbye and did his best to turn his body in a way that wouldn’t reveal his raging hardness.

The bathroom door slammed behind him as he ripped his pants down and tore some toilet paper from the dispenser. Within five strokes he was shooting his load with his forehead against cooling tiles.

He felt ridiculous, but more importantly, it worried him that he’d been so close to losing control over himself. It wasn’t anywhere near familiar territory.

But if he thought about it, about what he’d just witnessed, he knew he wouldn’t trade it for the world. He washed his hands, and then his face, and studied it in the mirror. It looked the same. He couldn’t see anything that would appeal to Zack in it. He looked old, or older than Zack, at least.

He grabbed a package of wet wipes and the waste bin, put on a good-natured smile and walked back into the living room. He politely turned around while Zack wiped himself down and put his pyjama bottoms back on. 

Zack pulled him by the hips, backwards down into the sofa when he was done. Zack eagerly moved the waste bin to the side, reached for the remote and put his TV-show back on. The joy that flowed from Angeal’s chest was like a river. The flow grew when Zack wrapped his arms around his neck and flung his legs over his lap.

Angeal kissed the top of Zack’s head. “Am I really allowed to have you like this?” 

“Am I really allowed to stay with you, here, like this?” Zack mumbled into his chest, not even pretending to watch the TV.

Angeal hummed and pulled his beloved Puppy closer, thoughtfully fingering the collar around his neck. He did then, what he hadn’t allowed himself to do earlier.

He pulled the hand Zack had used to stroke himself free. He turned it delicately in his, flexed it open and planted a kiss on the palm, and then on each fingertip. In his mind, he thanked them each for doing what he himself had been too afraid to do. 

Zack looked up with affection and wonder.

He loved-. No. He just loved.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, what you think, gang?

**Author's Note:**

> Okay. Please fill my comment section with the following:
> 
> Praise, dislikes, but more importantly
> 
> *suggest reasons to why Zack needs to be punished/rewarded. I only have a few, and I need MORE*  
> *also suggestions for how exactly Zack should be disciplined within the realm of gentle but firm petplay or dom/sub play that shifts borders so subtly between them Zack barely notices.* 
> 
> That's all. Thanks for approving of this message.


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